


Have Faith in This

by lovelivesinthedream



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Misunderstandings, based on the poem "But You Didn't"
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-10
Updated: 2015-11-10
Packaged: 2018-05-01 00:47:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5185811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovelivesinthedream/pseuds/lovelivesinthedream
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Minseok has always been better than Baekhyun believes he deserves. Baekhyun is grateful for him every single day.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, not everyone gets a happy ending.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Have Faith in This

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written for winterlights9092 fest on livejournal. Thanks for reading, and I'll apologize in advance for any tears you may shed. I'm sorry.

“I have a great idea!”

 

Minseok raises one eyebrow in question without looking up from the book he’s diligently reading. He’s sitting in the corner of the couch, curled up with his feet tucked under him and his elbow resting against the couch’s arm. Baekhyun smiles softly to himself because at times Minseok is just too cute to bear.

 

He shakes himself out of his besotted staring and claps his hands together like an excited child. “Okay, Mr. Bookworm, since I can see you’re just dying to hear my brilliant idea, I will tell you!” Minseok makes a big show out of tearing his eyes away from the page and putting the bookmark firmly in place. He even turns, fully facing Baekhyun and giving his undivided attention. Baekhyun preens.

 

“Let’s go to Lotteworld!”

 

“That’s a terrible plan, Baek,” Minseok says with a fond shake of his head. He promptly turns back to his book. “Inside is always insanely busy, and we can’t go outside. It’s supposed to rain all afternoon.”

 

Not one to take no for an answer, Baekhyun hops down from the stool he’d been spinning on only minutes earlier and pads across the thick carpet on bare feet. They both know that Minseok can see him, but he still plays along, pretending he doesn’t know what game Baekhyun is playing like he always does. Minseok is a brazen enabler when it comes to his boyfriend.

 

Baekhyun flops over the back of the couch and wraps his arms around Minseok’s shoulders, peppering kisses all over Minseok’s messy hair, soft cheeks and smooth neck--any place that he can reach. Minseok laughs and squirms cutely until he uses those impressive arm muscles to pull Baekhyun over the couch and into his lap, tickling him mercilessly.

 

He tries to flip himself over, but Minseok has hard abs, toned biceps and thick thighs. Baekhyun is deliciously trapped, caged in Minseok’s embrace, chest to chest. Except, he knows his boyfriend’s weakness, and he is shameless enough to exploit it. He runs his hands down Minseok’s sides, catching on the hem of his shirt and sneaking fingers underneath the soft fabric. Minseok pauses underneath him as Baekhyun drags his fingers in small, slow circles across the scorching skin of Minseok’s navel. A thin trail of hair catches his fingers, causing a stutter in his path and a hitch in Minseok’s breathing.

 

“You cheat,” Minseok whispers, hips unconsciously canting up and hands guiding Baekhyun into a smooth kiss.

 

“You love it,” he replies with a playful nip at Minseok’s bottom lip. He scratches his thumb up the trail of hair and digs his nail in on the way back down, stopping right under the button of Minseok’s jeans. Minseok groans and throws his head back, arm up to cover his eyes. Baekhyun takes delight in the pink flush growing down Minseok’s neck.

 

When he accidentally chuckles, breaking the moment, Minseok sits up and pushes Baekhyun away, tugging his shirt back in place with red cheeks. He’s so beautiful, even when he’s grumbling in mild-annoyance.

 

“Okay, okay. You win.” He’s trying to fight the smile from his face, but Baekhyun can see the warmth in his eyes. He’s not really mad, even if he acquiesces with a gruff, “We can go to Lotteworld.”

 

Baekhyun tackles him with more kisses in glee.

 

(They return home four hours later. Their clothes are still damp and uncomfortable from getting soaked in the downpour. Minseok has a giant chocolate stain on his favorite swim-shorts from where a little kid ran into him with ice cream. They both have splitting headaches from all the noise and chaos, and they were only able to go on three rides because the lines were so long.

 

Baekhyun is quiet as he toes off his shoes. Minseok hasn’t said anything, but he’s probably upset. He wasted his whole afternoon off because Baekhyun insisted they go, even after Minseok warned that it would be busy and rainy all day.

 

“Hey,” Minseok says softly, brushing Baekhyun’s wet hair back from falling in his eyes. “What’s wrong?”

 

Baekhyun looks down, embarrassed. “I ruined your day.”

 

Minseok’s time off is scarce. The official hours he’s supposed to clock are something like 48 hours a week, max, but there’s always one more patient that needs his help or one more doctor that needs him to cover his shift. Minseok is a dedicated, hardworking individual, and he’s unwilling to do anything less than his best. Baekhyun knows that. He understands. Minseok’s time off is valuable, and Baekhyun’s made him waste a whole day when he should have been relaxing on the couch, reading his book.

 

“No, you didn’t. It wasn’t ruined! I don’t know about you, but I had a lot of fun.” Minseok forces Baekhyun to meet his eyes, carefully holding his cheek like he’s something precious and important to be handled with care. “Anything I do with you is fun, Baek.”

 

Baekhyun can’t help the way his heart warms or the smile that lights up his face.)

 

*****

 

“What’s he doing?” Chanyeol asks with a mouth full of food. He nods toward where Minseok is crouched a few feet away in the grass over some purple flowers.

 

Baekhyun laughs. “He got a new phone two days ago, and he’s been taking pictures of everything ever since. Apparently, the camera’s fantastic.”

 

“Really?” Chanyeol looks intrigued. “He should stop by the show tomorrow night and take some pics for the website. Junmyeon took the last ones two years ago when I had that perm.” He punches Baekhyun in the arm. “I still can’t believe you let me do that to my hair.”

 

“What are friends for if not to enable all your bad decisions?” Baekhyun asks with a sly grin. Bugging Chanyeol is one of his favorite sports. Between him and Jongdae, it might as well be an Olympic event.

 

Kyungsoo rolls his eyes. “Your world view is so warped. I honestly have no idea how you have any friends at all.”

 

Baekhyun gasps and dramatically presses a hand over his chest. “Ouch! Jesus, someone’s out for blood today.”

 

“He’s pissy because Yixing is making him go to Yifan’s party on Saturday,” Chanyeol explains. There’s ketchup smeared across his chin. How does that even happen to a grown ass man? Baekhyun could be a good friend and tell him, but it wouldn’t be fun. Best just to let Chanyeol head back to work like that.

 

“Oooh.” Baekhyun leans forward, intrigue piqued for more gossip. “The current boyfriend is encouraging him to hangout with the old boyfriend. This is exciting! Do I detect a threesome in the works? Is Yixing actually a kinky bastard?” He delightedly clasps his hands in front of himself, a wicked gleam in his eyes. “I knew he was hiding something. Nobody is that sweet and innocent.”

 

Kyungsoo’s face is completely blank, but his stare is frosty enough to make Baekhyun shiver despite the summer heat. He looks past Baekhyun’s shoulder and speaks in a deadpan voice, “How can you stand him for more than five minutes at a time? You deserve a sainthood.”

 

Minseok shrugs and settles beside Baekhyun on the bench. “I find better ways to keep his mouth occupied, mostly,” is his casual response. He throws his arm over Baekhyun’s shoulders and pulls him close in the stunned silence that follows. Kyungsoo looks a little green while thinking about that, and Chanyeol chokes on a tomato.

 

Baekhyun doesn’t even try to suppress his smug grin while Kyungsoo slaps Chanyeol’s back in a half-hearted attempt to help him breathe again. Everyone thinks Baekhyun’s the pervert in their relationship (and he sort of is), but Minseok can be just as bad when he’s feeling feisty. Baekhyun loves it.

 

“Hey, do you want to go to Chanyeol’s gig tomorrow night? He wants you to take pictures of the band for their website with your fancy new phone.”

 

Minseok frowns cutely. “I told Changmin I’d cover his shift at the hospital tomorrow night.” His hand is warm and comfortable as he squeezes Baekhyun’s shoulder. There’s genuine regret in his tone when he apologizes to Chanyeol. “I’m sorry, Yeol. Maybe some other time?”

 

Chanyeol’s face is ridiculous on his best days, but Baekhyun still doesn’t like the way it falls or the way his shoulders slump sadly. Picking on his friend is one thing; his friend actually being upset is something else entirely.

 

“Hyung,” he begins, turning his puppy dog eyes to Minseok. It’s another one of Minseok’s weaknesses. “I could borrow your phone. Just for one night. It’ll be fine.”

 

Minseok looks repentant as he shakes his head. “It cost almost 900,000 won. Other than my car, this is the most expensive thing I own. And, Baek, I love you, but,” he ducks his head, voice quiet, “you’re kind of clumsy.”

 

“What?!” Baekhyun squawks indignantly. “Excuse you, but I am the epitome of grace.” Kyungsoo snorts loudly across the picnic table. He swats Minseok’s chest, resolutely ignoring the firmness of his pecs, and pouts. “I’m hurt, Minseok. You hurt me.”

 

He’s being overdramatic as he’s always been prone to be. Minseok should be used to it by now, but, luckily for Baekhyun, he’s still not immune to Baekhyun’s fluttering eyelashes or the cute frown on his face.

 

He caves easily. “I’m sorry,” he whispers in Baekhyun’s ear, placing a soft kiss against his cheek. “You can borrow my phone tomorrow night. Just please,” he squeezes Baekhyun’s hand and scrunches up his face in a funny expression of worry, “please be careful with it.”

 

“Thanks, hyung,” he chimes in reply. He kisses Minseok until Kyungsoo and Chanyeol pretend to vomit, and then they purposefully kiss some more.

 

(“I’m so sorry,” Baekhyun pleads quietly.

 

Minseok isn’t even looking at him.

 

He’s in the doorway, unsure of his welcome as Minseok sits on the edge of the bed with his cracked phone cradled in his hands. He’s still in his green scrubs from working a twelve hour shift at the hospital. His hair is mussed and his clothes are rumpled and worn – there’s a rust colored stain across the thigh of his pants that Baekhyun doesn’t want to know the source of. Tired lines frame his handsome face.

 

He must be exhausted and hungry, and coming home to a drunk boyfriend and a broken 900,000 won smartphone is probably making him regret his decision to ever give Baekhyun a chance back at that coffee shop two years ago. He probably hates Baekhyun now.

 

Baekhyun can be a morose drunk sometimes.

 

“I’m really sorry,” he whispers again. He sniffs and wipes his wet cheeks. When did he start crying?

 

Minseok finally looks up. Baekhyun expects anger and yelling, though he’s not sure why. His boyfriend hasn’t ever yelled at him before. But still, Minseok trusted him with a prized possession, and Baekhyun’s clumsy ass destroyed it. He destroyed Minseok’s trust. Now Minseok’s going to leave him, or kick him out, and Baekhyun will have to be sad and alone forever because nobody is as good as Minseok.

 

“Shh,” Minseok urges quietly, stepping closer. “It’s okay, Baekhyun. It’s just a phone. I don’t even care about it.” He wraps his arms around Baekhyun’s waist and pulls him close, allowing Baekhyun to burrow in his warmth. He rocks them gently and brushes one hand through Baekhyun’s chestnut colored hair. “It still works and everything. It’s fine. It’s only a tiny crack on the screen. Don’t worry about it.” He presses his lips to Baekhyun’s hair. “Please, don’t cry.”

 

Baekhyun clings to Minseok’s scrubs, balling the green fabric in his hands selfishly because he doesn’t want to let go. He doesn’t want to lose Minseok.

 

“I’m not going anywhere, Baekhyun,” Minseok promises. “I won’t leave you.”

 

It takes a little while for Baekhyun to calm down. Minseok, always kind and helpful, makes him drink a tall glass of water and brush his teeth before stripping off his clothes and bundling him in the cozy blankets. Baekhyun’s eyes are bleary and tired, but he does his best to stay awake until Minseok crawls in behind him and holds him a few moments later. He knows when he wakes up in the morning there will be more water on the nightstand with a bottle of painkillers beside it because Minseok takes care of him.

 

Minseok is always there for him.)

 

*****

 

“Did you see the handsome couple by the balcony? They’re so cute together,” Dr. Jung exclaims as she pours herself more punch.

 

“I know!” Dr. Liu agrees excitedly. “But are they official now? I thought Dr. Kim already had a boyfriend.” She tilts her head in thought and then shrugs. “It was adorable when Dr. Shim wiped the chocolate off Dr. Kim’s cheek.”

 

“I hate that guy,” Baekhyun fumes a few feet away.

 

Jongdae cackles, nearly spilling his soda in the process. “You mean you’re jealous because of the star-struck way your boyfriend stares at him.” Jongdae’s lips curl up in a mischievous smile. “He is ridiculously hot. And a doctor. You should be worried.”

 

Baekhyun feels no remorse when he kicks Jongdae swiftly in the shin. He should have invited Chanyeol to this party instead. Chanyeol always takes Baekhyun’s side and doesn’t act like an ass. Jongdae’s snarky comments are only appreciated when they’re at other people’s expense.

 

“I mean it. He’s so smug and pretentious.” Baekhyun tries to glare holes into the doctor’s stupid fancy tailored black suit near the open doors of the balcony. “And his face. God. Cheekbones aren’t meant to be that high? Jaw lines aren’t meant to be that sharp? What the fuck. Asshole.” He downs half his drink in one gulp.

 

Maybe he’s a little jealous and bitter.

 

Jongdae has his phone out and pointed at Baekhyun’s angry scowl.

 

“What are you doing?” he growls.

 

“Sending this to Kyungsoo. He’s going to love it.” Jongdae grins brightly, not at all concerned that Baekhyun is seriously considering punching him in the face.

 

Minseok saves Jongdae’s face by coming over with his friend. “Hey, Baek. You remember Changmin, right?”

 

“Sure,” he responds sourly. Shim Changmin: two years older than Minseok, a doctor at the same hospital, tall, handsome, athletic, smart, kind to little kids and old people. Gross. “How could I forget?”

 

He may have said that in the same way someone would respond to dog crap on the bottom of their shoe.

 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you again, Baekhyun. Minnie talks about you all the time,” Changmin says with a kind smile, ignoring Baekhyun’s thinly veiled hostility because he’s such a great guy. Ugh.

 

Wait. Minnie??

 

Minseok hates to be called that. He looks at Minseok, waiting to hear his boyfriend reprimand Changmin for using the nickname that he can’t stand. Instead of angry, though, Minseok appears positively glowing. His cheeks are pink, and he ducks his head shyly.

 

“I don’t talk about him! Well… not all the time, at least. Only when I think of something cute,” he mumbles.

 

Changmin grins widely and ruffles Minseok’s dark hair affectionately.

 

Baekhyun is only human. He can’t be blamed for the irrational jealousy that scorches hot through his veins when he sees some guy obviously hitting on his boyfriend. Nor can he be blamed for dumping his soda over Changmin’s fancy-schmancy suit.

 

“Baekhyun!” Minseok scolds with a furious furrow to his brows. He huffs and turns his back completely, stealing napkins from a nearby table to pat down Changmin’s wet silk shirt under his suit jacket. “I’m so sorry about that! It was just an accident! Send me the bill, and I’ll pay for the dry-cleaning. There’s a great place a few blocks from the hospital-”

 

Baekhyun watches in shock for a full minute before he can’t take anymore. He’s clearly not needed here. He’s not a doctor; he doesn’t fit in at these elegant dinner parties. Baekhyun is loud and impish, overdramatic and jealous.

 

Minseok and Changmin make a great couple. A better couple. Everyone else thinks so.

 

(The air is chilly this late at night. The sky is dark, stars all blotted out with smog and light pollution. A woman in a halter top, short leather skirt and fishnet stockings standing on the street corner gives him a calculating glance. He shakes his head and hurries on his way.

 

He doesn’t even make it to the bus stop around the corner when there’s a sharp tug on his arm. He whirls around, half expecting to see the woman from the corner trying to proposition him, but hoping against hope that it’s Minseok. The fresh air has cleared his head. Outside of the stuffy room, away from the gossiping people and Jongdae’s jokes, Baekhyun realizes what an idiot he is.

 

“Where are you going?” his boyfriend asks harshly. His voice is low and calm, his eyes sharp and cold. He’s so pissed.

 

And why wouldn’t he be? Baekhyun just poured a drink all over his friend and co-worker. Did he really have such little faith in Minseok that he felt so wickedly jealous? Has Minseok ever given him cause to doubt his feelings or fidelity throughout their whole relationship?

 

He could apologize right now and beg Minseok to forgive him. He could fix this-

 

\--but Baekhyun is not good at admitting his own shortcomings.

 

“Does it matter?” he challenges recklessly. “Isn’t Changmin waiting for you?”

 

Minseok steps away, face scrunched in confusion. “No? Why would he be?” He’s genuinely perplexed, eyes squinted and head tilted to the side. “I told him I needed to leave so I could find you. Make sure you’re okay. I don’t know what’s going on, but you can talk to me, Baek.” His hands only catch air when he reaches out for Baekhyun. “About anything.”

 

Baekhyun snorts derisively. “Is that so, Minnie?” There’s an ugly sneer on his face. His mother used to tell him his face would freeze that way if he kept it up. For a moment, he thinks of what she’d say if she could see him in this exact second, but her anger would not be about Baekhyun’s rude facial expressions.

 

He shoves the thought away roughly. Thinking about it now won’t make this situation with Minseok any better.

 

“How the hell am I supposed to help if you won’t tell me what’s wrong?” Minseok asks with a shout. It’s not often that he gets loud (outside of the bedroom, at least) - it only happens when he’s really upset and never directly at Baekhyun. “Is this about Changmin? Because he’s just a friend, Baekhyun. Only a friend.” He scowls, and his voice is suddenly low and hard. “We’re not even whatever the fuck you and Zitao were for the first three months we dated.”

 

The words are lobbed at Baekhyun like a flaming arrow, and they strike true right in his heart.

 

He’s always felt like garbage for messing around with Zitao when he and Minseok first starting seeing each other. He and Zitao had been occasionally getting off together since their junior year of college. In fact, the very first time he met Minseok at the coffee shop was after leaving Zitao’s bed before the sun even rose in order to make his 7am Musical Theory class. Back then, he told himself that it was okay because everything was unofficial. Minseok wasn’t technically his boyfriend, and Zitao only wanted something fun and casual. Even when Baekhyun knew he was really into Minseok, he didn’t end his arrangement of late nights spread across any flat surface of Zitao’s apartment. Minseok wanted to take things slow, see if they were compatible enough to be together, and Zitao was always thirsty for whatever Baekhyun was offering. It was a shitty thing to do, but Minseok never once said he wanted to be exclusive. And as soon as Minseok made it clear that he wanted to be in a monogamous relationship, Baekhyun cut things off with Zitao.

 

Minseok has always known what went on back then, but he never seemed bothered by it before now. It’s always been a sore spot for Baekhyun, though. He’s always felt guilty, even if he didn’t technically do anything wrong.

 

He blinks rapidly and refuses to let any tears fall. “How long have you been holding that one in?” His voice is thick and raspy with pain.

 

“I-That’s not--” Minseok rubs his eyes with the palms of his hands and takes a deep breath. “That was uncalled for, Baekhyun, and I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it.” He clenches his jaw and looks away. The streetlights sparkle off the wetness gathering in his eyes. Whether it’s from remorse or frustration, Baekhyun isn’t sure.

 

“It’s just frustrating, you know?” He laughs humorously and shakes his head, still looking away. “I trust you. When you’re at Chanyeol’s gigs, hanging out at bars with hot guys and sexy girls, I don’t worry for even a second. When you’re at Sehun’s place, playing video games for so long that you lose track of time and don’t come home, I trust you. Even though Zitao is there, with you, probably sitting right beside you on the couch with his golden skin and smoldering eyes. Even then, I trust you.” Minseok finally turns to meet Baekhyun’s stare. His eyes are haunted with pained shadows. “Why can’t you trust me, too?”

 

“I do!” he yells, throwing his hands up. “I do trust you! It’s Dr. Shim Changmin with his model-like good looks and the heart of a god damn saint that I don’t trust! He’s so fucking perfect, and I—I’m not.” Baekhyun stares down at his scuffed up Vans, unable to see the disappointment that he’s so sure must be painted across his boyfriend’s face.

 

Small hands surprise him, gently but surely lifting his face until he’s forced to stare into Minseok’s eyes. There’s fire, sweet and deep and endless, burning in his chocolate colored gaze. Baekhyun feels like he’s being set aflame with the determination and love he finds there. It leaves him breathless.

 

“You’re an idiot, Byun Baekhyun,” Minseok says, soft and unbearably fond. “You’re loud, obnoxious, and messy. Sometimes you forget to put the cap on the toothpaste, leave your towel on the bathroom floor, and you never rinse your goddamn dishes when you put them in the sink. But,” he pauses to place a tender kiss on Baekhyun’s parted lips. “I love you. Even all those annoying habits of yours.” He wipes the tears that silently slide down Baekhyun’s cheek with his thumb, smoothing away Baekhyun’s worries with each meaningful word and touch. Minseok’s face is pink, embarrassed, but he doesn’t look away. “If you’d been paying attention back there, you would have realized Changmin was picking on me for talking about you all the time.”

 

Baekhyun gives a watery laugh, too pleased and warm inside to let the embarrassment cling to him. He buries his face in Minseok’s neck, breathing in the comforting scent of Minseok’s cologne and skin. It feels like home. Like safety and relaxation. Like happiness.

 

“I love you, too.”

 

He can hear the smile in Minseok’s voice as he murmurs, “I know,” kissing the top of Baekhyun’s head and holding him close. “However, you still have to apologize to Changmin for ruining his shirt.”

 

Baekhyun laughs.)

*****

 

Minseok gasps, throaty and loud, threading his fingers through Baekhyun’s hair. He tugs once in warning, but Baekhyun hasn’t ever been one to heed caution. He hollows his cheeks, bobbing his head down further and further until his nose is pressed into tight, soft black curls. His throat aches as he tries to relax the muscles and take more.

 

“God! Minseok hisses.

 

“Most people call me Baekhyun,” is his cheeky, muffled reply. His mouth is too full for proper sass. Minseok rolls his eyes and thrusts once in payback for saying something so cheesy. Baekhyun groans. There’s a twitch in his cock, hot and heavy on Baekhyun’s tongue. His hips nearly vibrate under Baekhyun’s hands from where Minseok is still restraining himself from pounding forward.

 

Baekhyun doesn’t want any holding back. Not today.

 

He pulls away, just a little, curling his tongue up and over, tracing the pulsing veins he can feel against his taste buds. Minseok huffs, harsh, and bites his fist to keep from screaming. Baekhyun doesn’t bother to hide his smirk when he laps up the pre-cum leaking from the tip of Minseok’s cock.

 

“Quit playing and take what you want, hyung.” He flutters his eyelashes, looking up from under them over the chiseled planes of Minseok’s heaving chest in challenge.

 

Minseok’s eyes narrow, pupils completely blown. He rises swiftly, in one fluid motion, and pushes Baekhyun back on the bed. He straddles Baekhyun’s face, knees on either side of his head, delicious, strong thighs holding him up, and raises one eyebrow in question. Baekhyun finds it endlessly endearing that Minseok still asks, every time, just to make sure Baekhyun is really into it.

 

He drops his mouth open in silent approval.

 

Minseok growls, panting, as he slides his cock back into the warmth of Baekhyun’s willing mouth. Baekhyun’s eyes roll back in pleasure. He reaches up and pulls Minseok forward with a firm grip on the back of his thighs. His throat protests for a second before he relaxes further, urging Minseok in more, more, with nails digging into his skin.

 

Minseok throws his head back, neck arched while Baekhyun guides him to fuck his mouth. It’s fast and dirty, saliva and pre-cum leaking out of his stretched and reddened lips. The sounds of heavy breathing and pleasured grunts fill the air, skin slapping against skin, his balls hitting Baekhyun’s chin with every thrust forward. Minseok’s skin in slippery in his grasp, but Baekhyun holds on tight, begging for more, to be closer even though Minseok’s as deep as he can go.

 

His own cock is throbbing between his legs, untouched and aching. He can feel it slap against his stomach on each of Minseok’s downward thrusts into his mouth. Everything feels so hot, burning, and he’s so close. Very close. All he needs is—

 

“Mine. You’re all mine. I love you. So good, Baek. So good and all mine,” Minseok mutters to himself, just loud enough for Baekhyun to hear. His eyes are closed, his shoulders slumped forward, one hand braced on the bed and the other tugging on Baekhyun’s hair, pulling him closer with each thrust. His thighs quiver under Baekhyun’s hands. “Mine.”

 

Baekhyun comes, nearly blacking out at the unexpected release. He squeezes his eyes shut, and his entire body tightens, straining as the pearly liquid shoots out of his cock.

Minseok pulls out and jerks himself off quickly, watching with predatory eyes as he comes all over Baekhyun’s face and neck.

 

He collapses on his side, chest still heaving when his cock gets too sensitive to keep tugging on. Baekhyun half-heartedly attempts to wipe his face off on the sheet, licking up what’s on his lips and chin. He slides over quickly, and Minseok doesn’t hesitate to raise his arm so Baekhyun can slip beside him, curled up with his head resting over Minseok’s heart.

 

It’s quiet for a few moments. The sound of Minseok’s heartbeat drums against his ear, fast and frantic until it gradually slows in sync with his own cooling rhythm. Minseok traces patterns on Baekhyun’s sweat-dampened skin with his fingertips. Baekhyun basks in the afterglow. Sometimes he enjoys the cuddling even more than the fucking. Regardless, he loves every second he spends with Minseok, especially like this. His boyfriend is normally so put together, prim and proper and respectable. It’s only here, in the privacy of their own little world, that Minseok turns into such an uninhibited beast.

 

Baekhyun loves it as he loves all things about Minseok.

 

The pleasant atmosphere crashes when Minseok sighs and lets out a heavy breath. “Are you really going to tell her this time? I can stay and help you get through it.”

 

Baekhyun freezes. It’s the same argument they’ve had a hundred times lately. Baekhyun is terrified to tell his mother that he’s dating Minseok; she thinks they’re just good friends and roommates. Minseok’s been very understanding of Baekhyun’s reluctance, and for the first year and a half of their relationship he never brought up Baekhyun coming out to his mother at all. It’s only for the last six months or so that Minseok’s become more persistent.

 

“I want to tell her,” Baekhyun hedges. It’s not a lie. He does want to tell his mother the truth.

 

His father already knows - has known since that summer after the divorce when Baekhyun was 17 and messing around with Choi Minho from down the street. His father is fine with Baekhyun’s life. His mother, though… Well, she’s always been drilling it in his head that she wants a sweet daughter in-law and cute grandkids since he learned to walk. He wants to tell her, but whether or not he’ll be able to work up the courage to do so is a grim prospect.

 

“You can’t be here for it, though. I’ll never be able to say it while you’re here. I’d be too worried that she’ll say something hurtful to you.”

 

Minseok frowns, petting his back thoughtfully. “You shouldn’t have to face that alone, Baekhyun. I can take whatever she’ll say.”

 

“No,” Baekhyun protests. He sits up and rests on his elbow so he can stare down at Minseok. “I’ll tell her this time. I’ll do it. But you need to go to Luhan’s like usual, okay? Let me handle it.”

 

Minseok stares at him, searching his face for a moment. He must realize that Baekhyun won’t be budged on the matter because he smiles softly and nods. “Okay,” he agrees and places a tender kiss on Baekhyun’s sore lips.

 

(The door closes as his mother leaves, and Baekhyun can’t look. Minseok is silent, putting his bag down in the bedroom and not saying a single goddamn word. Baekhyun feels sick, a thousand snakes squirming around his stomach and under his ribs.

 

He’s managed to let Minseok down once again. It’s the only thing he’s good at these days.

 

“I was going to do it,” he whispers. The sound is deafening in the empty silence.

 

Minseok doesn’t acknowledge him in any way as he continues in the bedroom. The drawer of the stand on his side of the bed closes, barely hiding a black velvet box they both know is waiting there. He moves to the dresser, taking care of his clothes, all freshly washed and folded from doing laundry at Luhan’s house. Baekhyun doesn’t like the way he can smell Luhan all over Minseok, but it’s his own fault. He’s the one that forced his boyfriend to stay over at Luhan’s for the last three days while his mother was visiting, instead of staying here, in his own home where he belongs.

 

“It’s complicated, Minseok.”

 

His boyfriend finally stops. He drops his neatly folded shirt in the drawer haphazardly and turns, facing Baekhyun with a blank look. “It’s not. It’s not complicated at all. You’re not ready for her to know. See?” he asks, raising an eyebrow. “It’s as simple as that. You’re not ready.”

 

His voice catches on the last word, and he tears his eyes away, dodging past Baekhyun to walk out the door and toward the kitchen. Baekhyun grabs his hand, holding Minseok in place. He rests his forehead between Minseok’s shoulder blades, aching inside as he feels his boyfriend tense under his touch.

 

“I want to be ready. I want to tell her how happy you make me. How good you are for me. God, you’re the perfect boyfriend, the kind of person that parents always hope and pray their children will end up with.” He digs his fingers into the fabric of Minseok’s shirt, clinging and breathing through his nose to hold back tears. “And I know, I know, that if I was a girl, my mother would have us married already. She’d be so ecstatic. But with the reality of us, two guys… I just don’t know what she’ll say. She’s always wanted grandchildren, Minseok. For as long as I can remember, my mother’s wanted a pretty daughter in-law and cute little grandchildren. She’ll be so disappointed in me,” he whispers brokenly.

 

Minseok deflates. Baekhyun can actually feel the fight as it leaves Minseok’s body. It stabs at him, hitting him low and hard right behind his heart. Knowing that he’s causing his boyfriend pain hurts almost as bad as the thought of upsetting his mother. The situation is shitty all the way around. No matter what he does, somebody is going to end up unhappy.

 

He wishes things were different, but he’s not sure in what way. What would make this better? Not being gay in the first place? Not being such a coward?

 

Minseok is crying when he finally faces Baekhyun. There are tears sliding down his round cheeks, and Baekhyun is officially the worst human being ever. In the two years they’ve been together, he’s never seen his boyfriend cry. Baekhyun gets misty eyed over sad movies or a few too many drinks. He’s a crier. Minseok, though, he’s different. He’s always optimistic and happy in a quiet, unobtrusive kind of way. He doesn’t cry.

 

Right here, right now, he’s got tears falling from his eyes, and it’s all Baekhyun’s fault.

 

“I’m sorry,” is all Baekhyun can say. “I’m so sorry.”

 

Minseok shushes him with soft lips pressed against his eyelids, forehead and the tip of his nose. Their tears mix, wetting each other’s skin. “I don’t blame you, Baekhyun,” he exhales against Baekhyun’s cheek. “I don’t blame you, but I need to know. Is this it for us? Am I just a stand-in until the day your mother finds you a nice girl to marry? Am I only someone to pass the time with until you give in?”

 

His voice is ragged and wrecked. Baekhyun sobs and clutches Minseok tighter, fingers cramping from holding so fiercely. He shakes his head angrily. “No! You’re everything to me, Kim Minseok! Everything!”

 

“Okay. Okay.” Minseok is trembling against him and holding on just on firmly. “Then we’ll work on it, Baekhyun. Together.” He laughs, rough and cracked, sniffling through his nose. “I’ve always wanted a family someday. We can figure it out.”

 

Baekhyun feels like he might explode from happiness, but he’s afraid to get too far ahead of himself. What if Minseok’s not implying what Baekhyun thinks he is?

 

“Together,” Minseok promises, branding the word into Baekhyun’s skin with each press of his lips.)

 

*****

 

“Mom!” Baekhyun protests. His mother gives him a dry look and continues showing the pictures on her phone to the clueless stranger sitting next to her.

 

“And there they are at the beach! So cute together, aren’t they? My son is lucky his boyfriend thought to bring sunscreen.” She scrolls to the next picture where Minseok is carefully applying the white lotion to Baekhyun’s cheeks, a sweet smile on his face as he rubs it in with gentle thumbs. “Honestly, I don’t know how I raised such a carefree child. I’m glad he has someone with good sense to look after him. It really eases my heart.”

 

She’s talking to the lady sitting beside her, but Baekhyun knows the words are meant for him. Once he finally worked up the courage to tell her about Minseok (with a lot patience and reassurance from his boyfriend), his mother had admitted she’d known since the moment Baekhyun introduced them the first time. At first, she was disappointed, until she thought about all the options that were available for them to have children someday. She was only pretending not to know the whole time because she didn’t want to pressure Baekhyun into telling her anything. It pained her that he felt like he couldn’t be honest, and ever since he came out to her a month ago, she’s been supporting him fully and openly.

 

To everyone.

 

He smiles and ducks his head. “Mom, I’m sure that nice lady doesn’t want to hear about my love-life while she waits.”

 

His mother frowns. The lady quickly waves her hands. “I don’t mind! It helps to pass the time, at least.” She smiles sweetly, and that’s all it takes for Baekhyun’s mother to start proudly showing off all the pictures she’s taken of them in the last month. Baekhyun rolls his eyes fondly and settles more comfortably in his own seat.

 

He pretends to be annoyed, but honestly, it makes him almost giddy. He never imagined that he could be so happy, with Minseok as his boyfriend and his mother being okay with it, and now that it’s reality, he sometimes still has a hard time believing it. There are moments when he’s sure it must all be a dream. How did he get so lucky? He must have saved a country in his past life.

 

The time on his watch says 2:47pm. Minseok’s flight is supposed to land at 3:15pm. A few days ago he went to a medical conference with Changmin in Japan. Baekhyun hadn’t felt even a little jealous or worried when Minseok told him about it (not that he’d admit to, anyway), and as a reward, Minseok let Baekhyun ride him on the couch in front of the wide, open windows of their 8th floor apartment before he left. People in the building across from theirs’ probably had a nice view.

 

Baekhyun might get off on the idea of people seeing them.

 

Minseok is kind enough to indulge him once in awhile when Baekhyun is very, very good.

 

He grins to himself, cheeks heating as he recalls exactly how good he’d been. There’s a buzz in his pocket. He nearly falls out of the seat in surprise. His mother looks at him like he’s crazy, but she’s used to his oddness by now and quickly turns back to telling the lady their whole life story.

 

Curious, he pulls his phone out and swipes his thumb across the screen. It unlocks to the photo of Minseok curled up, knees to chest, leaning on the couch with a book perched under his nose. It’s the cutest, most handsome picture Baekhyun’s ever seen. His dark hair is a mess, and there’s a pair of glasses sliding down his nose. He’s so beautiful.

 

And then Baekhyun realizes the buzzing is a missed call from Minseok’s phone. He squints in confusion. People aren’t supposed to make calls from the plane, are they? He presses redial and the phone instantly transfers him to Minseok’s voicemail. It’s the generic robot greeting telling him to leave a message after the beep.

 

“Is everything alright?” his mother asks.

 

Baekhyun frowns down at his phone. “Minseok called me just a second ago, and I missed it. I tried to call back, but it’s not going through.”

 

His mother turns toward him and squeezes his thigh reassuringly. “I’m sure it’s nothing. He probably accidentally dialed you with that cute butt of his.”

 

“Mooom!” Baekhyun shrieks with a laugh. “Please don’t talk about my boyfriend’s butt!”

 

His mother and the lady beside her both laugh at the embarrassed flush coloring his cheeks and down his neck. She pinches his leg and smiles.

 

“Are you nervous?”

 

Baekhyun traces the outline of the ring in his pocket and takes a moment to think. Is he nervous to ask Minseok to marry him? Minseok is, hands down, the best thing that’s ever happened to him. Minseok is kind, warm and sweet. He’s strong when he needs to be, and he always puts up with Baekhyun’s crap. Minseok can make the best out of any situation. He’s sunshine and thunderstorms, light and passion, and he’s everything Baekhyun’s ever wanted or needed.

 

“Not at all,” he replies easily.

 

Besides, the velvet box in Minseok’s stand by the bed is gone which means it’s only a matter of time before he asks Baekhyun to marry him. Baekhyun wants to surprise him by asking first.

 

His mother hugs him with one arm around his shoulders. “I’m so proud of you, my little boy. And I’m happy for you both.” There are proud tears in her eyes that make Baekhyun choke up. He resolutely sucks back the sappiness, though.

 

Minseok will be landing soon, and Baekhyun doesn’t want to ruin the happiest moment of his life by having puffy red eyes. He’s sure his mother is going to photograph every second of the proposal. He doesn’t want to look hideous in those pictures when they’re pulled out at every major family function in the future.

 

“Thank you, mom.”

 

She pats him on the back for a second longer, and then she leans away. The lady beside her is distracted once again by his mother talking about Baekhyun’s older brother. He smiles and checks his watch again.

 

3:11pm.

 

Baekhyun waits excitedly, nearly bouncing in anticipation. Minseok will be landing any minute.

 

3:17pm.

 

3:19pm.

 

3:20pm.

 

”It’s not unusual for there to be slight delays,” the lady his mother’s been harassing tells him with a kind smile. “Don’t worry. My husband travels all the time for business, and this happens once in a while. They’ll be here soon.”

 

”I’ll keep that in mind,” Baekhyun bows in thanks and forces a smile past his worried frown. He can’t sit still, despite her attempt to stop his pacing. It’s ridiculous, probably, to be so worried. The plane is only five minutes late. That’s not a big deal. It’s entirely possible that the flight took off a little late and is now behind schedule.

 

Logic doesn’t stop the uneasy squirm in his stomach or the sweating of his palms. He bites his bottom lip and continues walking in the quick, tiny line from his chair to the wide windows.

 

3:21pm.

 

”You’ll burn a path in the rug, Baekhyun,” his mother chides. He shrugs and nervously watches the sky.

 

3:22pm.

 

3:23pm.

 

3:24pm.

 

”Excuse me,” says a small lady in a neatly pressed airport uniform. Her eyes are grave and her tone instantly causes Baekhyun’s heart to plummet. “I-I’m afraid I have some terrible news about the flight that was supposed to arrive at 3:15 from Japan.”

 

Baekhyun falls to his knees before she says anything else. His entire world stops.

 

(Minseok never makes it back.)

 

*****

 

The End


End file.
